Hi, I'm having a sad, sad day.
Oh, I recovered from my cold/fever thing. In fact yesterday I went on a road trip with strangers from the internet. It was chaotic, but there were some good points to the day. Then I thought of my lack of good faithful, constant friends.
Today was Palm Sunday as you know. It triggered a memory of my friend who died one and half years ago. My friend whom I shared adventures with, giggles with, and sad times with. When my own mother died, my friend called me long distance, and we both cried on the phone together. Two years ago, she was in the hospital as the dying process begin. After Palm Sunday Mass, I went to the hospital and took her a palm. Her husband was there too, and we had a good visit.
Today I could not take her a Palm because she's dead. I couldn't take her a Palm last year either. I thought of my friendship with her. I thought of spending the day with strangers yesterday. Seemed nice enough, but they aren't friends. After Mass I got in the car and cried like a small child.
I thought of friends who are too busy for me due to their own marriages, their own children, their jobs, or whatever. I'm sad.
I settled on the couch and started reading book. I thought it was fiction. No, it's non-fiction. It's about two couples who had loving marriages then a husband dies. Then the wife of the other couple dies. More death. So I'm crying. You can guess how the book ends. The widowed spouses (who are in their forties) find each other. They marry and experience great love. They get a second chance. I don't even get a first chance.
I want to write a note to my deceased friend's parents. I can't find their address or their email address. My friend and her husband had a joint email account. Is that email account still active? I emailed him asking for his in-laws' address. I thought about calling, but I am crying.
I just can't get it together today. Oh well. Now, I have a headache.
I'm sure there's a psalm that resonates with me today. And Jesus was betrayed and abandoned too. Sometimes it just stinks being human needing other humans.