Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Post-MD

MD stand's for Mother's Day, and I purposely did not attend Mass. You see, all the moms I have had are gone. I am not a mom. There's a lot of pain involved when I am confronted with Mother's Day. It's hard going to church where mothers are glorified (as they probably should be), but I really feel like I lack so much. On Sunday, I had a thought that I am a Catholic failure due to not bearing children. Well, my life didn't go that route. Sometimes the church people forget that we single people exist.

Instead I went shopping with another single friend, and took my dad on some errands. I had a really good day. While walking in the store, another woman wished my friend and me a Happy Mother's Day. Automatically I said, "thank you." Then a little while later my friend and I talked about what to say to such greetings. I decided that thank you was the appropriate response. It's nice that people wish me a nice day, and I take any polite and cheerful greetings that come my way. My friend is an atheist and said she has to nagivate in a world that is so religious. Sure, she could choose to believe God. I've known for quite a while that she was an atheist. I gave her a homemade Easter card. She thanked me. Even though I knew she was an atheist, I gave her a card anyway. It was Easter, and I was in the mood to spread joy and blessings around. But I did pray for her the other night. But I am just going to be me, and not try to convert her. Besides, I am not a very good Catholic if I'm skipping Mass.

Yes, at times I miss my mother and my grandmother. And yes, it would have been nice to hold a newborn of mine. At times I feel like I have so much LIFE inside of me that I need to express in other ways.

I can't believe I almost forgot that my cousin wished me a Happy Godmother's Day. I was her Confirmation sponsor.

I should have gone to church.

1 comment:

Leila @ Little Catholic Bubble said...

I hope you got your butt to confession, girl! :) Ah, the RCIA teacher in me.... but, I am sorry for your pain. You are not alone.... I know many singles in the Church feel similarly.

Thanks for your great comment on my blog!